... and dragons. At his funeral the mourners ask what they will do now when they ...a dawn attack 'we will feel our spears morning -cold in our hands' - but there will be no one...
1 Answers · Arts & Humanities · 25/04/2016
Believable only because it is so pathetic.
4 Answers · Arts & Humanities · 16/08/2013
The first sentence doesn't make sense. Creative, yes, but overly descriptive. Re-read and cut it down a bit. Subtle is best.
4 Answers · Arts & Humanities · 15/07/2013
It works. The only real issue is the opening paragraph. You know, it's ... don't know. No, actually I do know. It's the run-on sentences. They mess up the rhythm of the text, and since you...
1 Answers · Arts & Humanities · 21/02/2013
good ! but i would prefer more of short dialogues than descriptions . reading long descriptions makes me sleepy & close book as a reader
2 Answers · Arts & Humanities · 10/02/2013