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  1. I think it's pretty interesting! I like it so far. Present tense really isn't my style and it's hard for me to judge if it's really good or not because of that, but from what I've read, it's fine!

    3 Answers · Arts & Humanities · 29/07/2011

  2. Only have an prologue if you think it will help the story. No story needs a prologue and most people tend to want to get straight into chapter one, instead of faffing about with prologues. But as I say, have it if you need it. Starting with the daily weather report. Tut-tut...

    5 Answers · Arts & Humanities · 03/06/2011

  3. Pretty poor grammar and you should show, not tell. "A pack of mutants attacked him all over." why not say something like, "A pack of mutants ran at him a second later, tearing at him viciously as he...

    2 Answers · Arts & Humanities · 27/05/2011

  4. ... in any serious trouble…until the night he ends up in jail. Enter Sergeant Brown, a cop assigned to be Kevin's mentor. If Kevin...

    4 Answers · Arts & Humanities · 15/05/2011

  5. ... in any serious trouble…until the night he ends up in jail. Enter Sergeant Brown, a cop assigned to be Kevin's mentor. If Kevin...

    3 Answers · Arts & Humanities · 07/05/2011

  6. I like the basics you do need to work on details and develop it further though. I can imagine putting more emphasis to the character of Edward (being arrogant but kind at heart - or you can even reverse that!) and making up good conversations or use...

    3 Answers · Arts & Humanities · 22/02/2011

  7. ... brother has autism btw. Her father being a strict sergeant and her mother being a nurse is pretty realistic. And it...

    5 Answers · Arts & Humanities · 19/09/2010

  8. Not bad. I was a little captivated at the beginning, but then I got lost. And not in a good way. To me, it seems a little like Narnia, with all the strange beings and giants and such. But at the...

    5 Answers · Arts & Humanities · 11/08/2010

  9. Actually, I consider it quite well written.

    6 Answers · Arts & Humanities · 07/07/2010

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