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  1. There are lots of good things in this piece. Your writing style and humour, and your sentence structures etc, are all far better than most stuff that's posted on this site. So on that score, well done...

    8 Answers · Arts & Humanities · 06/08/2010

  2. ...renee olivia teri samantha caitlin sabrina brunette gorgeous girl- tally sarah anne annalise hannah mariana dana lissy jenna laney becca britney brunette guy- jacob chris mitchell tom ryan damon paul ian evan nathan/ nate connor ryder kyle matt blonde guy...

    4 Answers · Arts & Humanities · 22/08/2010

  3. Your writing is very good. It flows very well and is descriptive and captivating. It reminds me of the kind of writing styles in many great novels. I would continue reading on. The...

    6 Answers · Arts & Humanities · 15/08/2010

  4. ...period at the end is short for "department." "I knew Chris and Jen were having problems, but what couple hadn'...

    8 Answers · Arts & Humanities · 03/08/2010

  5. Hmm. I liked the ending of that part. Your ability to flashback to a time of childhood and describe it so easily (with a quirky comic touch) was very good. I’m not too sure I would read on just from that piece of information. I would want to (and need to) read the...

    2 Answers · Arts & Humanities · 25/07/2010

  6. Hmmm, these are all really good name. However, I don't like R.J, because his last name starts with an "R" already. Alex makes me think of a shy boy. Matt makes me think of a sporty person...

    8 Answers · Arts & Humanities · 10/07/2010

  7. it's okay I guess I would keep reading just to find out whats happening and depending on that I might finish

    4 Answers · Arts & Humanities · 08/07/2010

  8. ... would re write it in third person and let the reader see some of Chris's inner dialogue.

    2 Answers · Arts & Humanities · 07/07/2010

  9. I really, really liked it! I almost never read posts like this because it hurts my eyes to read the print so close together, but the first sentence drew me in, so I kept going. I'd definitely keep reading...

    6 Answers · Arts & Humanities · 07/07/2010

  10. Hannah could be is a link ------------------------------------------------------------------ Could it...

    5 Answers · Arts & Humanities · 31/08/2010

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